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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

On Cloud Nine




Oppressed, rejected and left out,
Nine out of ten, killed.
Could the wars be more ruthless?
Love, shattered into a million peices,
Orphaned, uncountable souls,
Undermining the value of joy,
Death, desperation, dignity - The world has lost it's all.
Neither hatred, Nor insecurity,
Is ever going to bring the laughter back,
Nursed I, a tiny wish forever,
Everyone be on cloud nine, together.



Prompted at Acrostics Only
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15 comments:

  1. AshritaJune 24, 2009 at 6:22 PM

    Loved the way it ended!!

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  2. IceMaidenJune 24, 2009 at 6:51 PM

    ditto!!! :)

    luv,
    Annie.
    P.S: I was lik :O whn i started to read.. y on earth wud u talk abt killin n dying in a acrostic abt cloud nine.. n then, wham! awesomee.. :)

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  3. SmitaJune 24, 2009 at 7:29 PM

    Such a nice way to put it :)

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  4. Shravan RaghunathJune 24, 2009 at 8:50 PM

    left with nothing more to say. well done

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  5. AnonymousJune 24, 2009 at 9:37 PM

    Such a nice poem wrapped in such a nice theme!
    Good read!

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  6. Princess CaspianJune 24, 2009 at 10:28 PM

    nice!:)

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  7. RHYTHM AND RHYMEJune 25, 2009 at 2:43 AM

    Well done,

    Yvonne.

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  8. OpaqueJune 25, 2009 at 3:05 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. OpaqueJune 25, 2009 at 3:16 AM

    Okay, I re-read this over and over again.

    Umm, I am able to establish a loose connection between "on cloud nine" and the rest of the lines. That's highly wishful thought you have there, considering the harshness of the real situation. And, that was exactly what was making me sceptical of the usage.

    Any ways, I admire the effort. Good luck!

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  10. SavannahJune 25, 2009 at 12:07 PM

    Welcome Miss Sunshine, glad you decided to join the fun.

    Interesting take on the prompt. Very thought provoking.

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  11. Miss SunshineJune 25, 2009 at 1:12 PM

    @Ash
    :D :D thanks :)


    @Annie
    haha, I know. I cudnt make it prominent, but koi ni..i'l keep trying :P

    @Smita
    thanks so much :)

    @Shravan
    heyy! Thanks :D that was something really nice. :)

    @Choco
    really? Thnx. :) That was really sweet of you. and I love your Display Picture :P

    @Caspian
    *eeeee* shukriya :P

    Yvonne
    thanks so much, I mean coming from you! You do brilliant poetry yourself :)

    @Brosreview
    Phew. I was waiting for you to comment. I know..it wasnt my best attempt..I couldn't properly establish the connection..but well, I'll keep trying. :) I wanted to do a different take, actually :)


    Thanks for appreciating :)

    @Savvanah
    Hey :) Thankks :D That's really motivating :)

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  12. roshwritesJune 26, 2009 at 1:06 AM

    Well written! Brilliant acrostic =D

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  13. AnonymousJune 26, 2009 at 4:32 AM

    I like! Nice one! :)

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  14. The Write GirlJune 26, 2009 at 7:36 AM

    This is a unique acrostic for on cloud nine. Very creative.

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  15. Miss SunshineJune 26, 2009 at 6:06 PM

    Thanks so much :D :P

    ReplyDelete

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