Between the moments of despair,
Reddening my conscience,
Opens the crowded bloom.
Knowingly or unknowingly,
Each and every breath,
Negotiates with my thoughts.
Versatile, I thought they were,
Emotion churning magnetisms,
Roaring and burning my thoughts,
Savouring every ounce of tear.
Epitome of sadness, the prose of my life would disappear,
So many misgivings, the broken verses would surrender.
P.S.: I saw the name "Broken Verses" on a bookcover. I don't even remember the author, but it just stuck, and instantly I knew it was to be spinned into an acrostic :)
Hope it makes sense.
23 comments:
Among the other poems that I have read here, this seems quite matured. I like it!
Indeed, I can feel, the verses are broken. Good job! Keep writing!!!
Hi there,
I enjoyed this, it reminds me of one of my poems, it is also an acrostic.
It is called when emotion and paper collide, I think you would enjoy it.
I agree with Brosreview. This one is a matured poem :) Nice job!
@B
I had to try hard to keep d broken verses, yet make some sense...hhehe..
Thanks, that's like the best comment ever :P :)
@TB
hey, thanks for coming :)
thanku very much, and surely , i'l visit ur profile :)
@Ash
YAYYYYYIIEE! thaankkkkkkkkkku :D
not a babbbbbbbby anymore. hahaha
ahan...
Finally I can say there is SOMETHING mature about you...nice nice..;)
Total justice. You brought out the meaning!
@PC
CHUP karle :P hehehe
thaaaanks
@Fatima
hey, thanks very much :)
man is this u? u writing such poetry too ? WOW this was like magnificent and just too matured and just too good ...keep writing gal
@Nabs
*EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*
Yes me, I was being wannabe-Ash-and-Nabs, sprinkled with a bit of Ms. R. :P
Thaaaaaaaankyou :D
Really a nice Acrostic.....enjoyed it.Keep writing!!
@Dreamer
hey..thanks a ton :)
Wonderful one :)
Wonderful one :)
@Nuchu
thaaanku :D
The acrostic is really cool!wish it had a happy ending though :) but it sound really professional :D
it doesnt have an ending..
It's just a stated truth or smthn..not a series of events.. thanks..
I like this, but the last two lines knocks it off balance.
I read the reviews to this book, and if it's in English, I plan on getting it so that I can experience this author.
Thanks for the suggestion. :)
Yes it is in English :D
and could u please, again, shed some light? I'd like to make it better :)
I enjoyed most of the poem but to be a true acrostic...I think it was too long in the lines.
Good attempt.:)
@maggie
yeah, perhaps. :D but i just cudnt express it in a short manner :D Hope i could do somethin bttr now :)
Miss Sunshine,
Post it to the workshop blog and I will work on it with you .. give you some suggestions.
Hi Miss Sunshine.
I have completed it. Hope it helps. I must say you are growing in leaps and bounds .. for one so young, in your writing. Keep up the good work!
thanks so much :D i am sure it would help :D
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