Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Need for a Need

It's a straightforward question, really. When you are in a relationship, and it's been long enough for you to feel comfortable with each other's mannerisms, behaviour, humour, and most importantly, know that you love each other, does the need to instill it everyday, diminish?

Is is just okay to stop saying those three magical words..? Because you know that it's there?

Call me clingy, or just brand me with the typical life saver, 'oh! she's a girl', but I feel the need to let the other person know that he is still as important and dear to me, as he was on the day we started dating. Especially when we are in a long distance relationship and I cannot really see his reassuring smile everyday. (Skype be damned. It's not the same, and you know it!) He tells me that it's really obvious and he doesn't see the need to repeat it, or tell it to me everyday, or even once in two or three days.. I get his point of view.. What's the need to keep discussing/talk about things which are already established, loud and clear?

I don't know. I am a very loving, and someone whose life's main aim is to pamper the other person, so subconsciously maybe I start expecting a little of that slobbery, stupid gestures. I make those cards, little cutie notes and stuff and gestures. So maybe, those expectations arise. But really, is expecting an I love you from your beloved a little too much to ask for? I really don't know. To top it all, now I've started feeling all clingy and weird when I say it and don't get a response, or do sweet things. I've started cringing away, or holding my words and emotions back, to not to make him feel suffocated or obligatory to reciprocate. Because that's not what I want. Him to reciprocate just because I forced him into it...

And, I really don't feel good about the holding back part.

Sucks and just SUCKS.

I wish he felt the same way that I did. Ahh. :|
Weirdness all around.


Jaideep said...

According to me, you should never keep saying stuff. I think actions speak louder than words. And, if the person is caring for you when you need it and if he is taking risks for you, I guess that is enough for you to understand that there is still love. That is what i believe.

Apurva said...

what if there are just no actions? and words are the only thing left to cling onto?
Taking risks..? Havent seen that in recent times.. I mean, nothing so out of the blue which I didn't/wouldn't.. Funny thing is.. he used to do everything before.. and now suddenly everything's vanished..
What do you suggest?

Jaideep said...

I don't think you are looking clearly. Think about the other person's circumstances. Step in his shoes and you'll know!

Apurva said...

It doesn't matter anymore.. Everyone's free now.

Jaideep said...

Appreciate the efforts when it did matter. Maybe that appreciation can make a difference! :)